Grand Coxsmith of New Cumbria Stands by Controversial Statement

 

Dr. Joseph Chang, Grand Coxsmith of New Cumbria, stated he will not bow to pressure and apologise for statements he made last week that have been interpreted as racist.

During a speech given yesterday in Central Fairview, he described New Cumbria as a unified region, "From the Wogs in Little Athens to the Taffies in New Llanfair", drawing heated complaints from Greek and Welsh communities across the nation.

Dr. Chang reportedly called the critics of his
statements "as thin-skinned as the Natives".

"This is an insult, plain and simple," Mayor of New Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch Rhys David Jones told CBS reporters earlier today, "how such a progressive nation such as Concordia can have an obviously racist man as Grand Coxsmith baffles me".

Paul Karafantis, head of the Greek-Concordian friendship league stated on CBS One radio this morning that he had an extreme desire to "cut off that malaka's testicles and serve them on my Souvlaki".

But despite all this outrage, Dr. Chang has stood by his statements, going so far as to tell our reporter "they're just words to describe race. I'm Chinese, I'm a Ching-Chong, you're French, you're a Frog. Your boss is probably Jewish, he's a Yid. I mean, I'm well travelled, and I mean, even the Professors at my university would use vernacular and slang terms for races such as calling our blacks 'darkies'".

Joseph Chang received his doctorate in Cultural Anthropology from North Carolina State University.

Harry Walker, CBS News.